Khaya Dlanga Explains the Meaning Behind the Ceremony
Author and media personality Khaya Dlanga has cleared up the confusion surrounding what many assumed was Anele’s wedding. Taking to social media, Dlanga explained that the event was in fact the final stage of the lobola process, accompanied by a deeply meaningful isiXhosa ceremony known as ukwamkela abakhwenyana—a formal acceptance of the groom by the bride’s family.
He emphasized that, in Xhosa tradition, lobola is not a once-off payment but a journey done in stages, even for those who can afford to pay all at once. “This is deliberate,” Khaya Dlanga wrote, “It ensures the groom remains present and committed to the union of both families, rather than disappearing once the celebrations are over.”
It Was Not a Wedding, Says Khaya Dlanga
While some guests referred to the event as a wedding, Dlanga clarified that the traditional wedding has not yet occurred. According to Xhosa custom, the official wedding takes place at the groom’s family home. What happened was the welcoming of ooMadiba by ooMfene, symbolizing unity and family connection—not a Western-style wedding.
Khaya Dlanga urged people not to equate terms like “bride” and “groom” to marriage in a Western sense, especially within traditional African customs where meanings differ. His post serves as an educational moment for many unfamiliar with the cultural nuances of lobola and traditional union ceremonies.
In a world quick to assume and label, Dlanga‘s thoughtful clarification reminds us of the richness and depth within African traditions—and the importance of respecting and understanding them.